Thursday

In the Fight of Her Life, She Is Not Alone


“I thought I was going in for a check-up. I didn’t expect to hear that it was cancer,” Dede explained through her strong, syrupy, Southern twang. “I went to the appointment alone because we all thought it was just fibrosis. When they said it was breast cancer, I was shocked. The doctors talked for about an hour but I didn’t hear anything after ‘cancer.’ It was kind of like Charlie Brown’s teacher. All of the words were jumbled and nothing made sense.”

 
I met Dede through The Bert Show, a local Atlanta morning radio show. Our initial wedding planning meeting was during one of her chemotherapy treatments since she wanted to keep her mind off cancer and on the planning. “You know, life doesn’t stop because you’re engaged.” I laughed when Dede quipped, “life doesn’t stop because you have cancer!” That became apparent while trying to schedule the venue tour, dress fitting, and the meetings with the florist around chemo treatments and weekly activities with Dede and Stephen’s now blended family.
 
During their recent engagement shoot, Dede, Stephen and I talked about the fears they both faced. I asked her if she was worried that Stephen would leave her after her diagnosis. She said she was scared that it would be too much for him to take on but he reassured her then and again right after she mentioned this to me, that he was in this for the long-haul. Stephen, with his reassuring smile, almost seemed shocked that that was even a concern. Dede talked about being worried that her children would view her as the “lazy mom” because she is rendered incapacitated days after her chemo treatments. As an adult, I’m understanding of the limitations that illness can bring but when I realized that children don’t always understand those things, it broke my heart.
 
 
 
When I think of Dede, I see that she is every woman. I think about the women I know who have been touched in some way by breast cancer. I think of Duette, Liz, and Ellie... I think of the lives they have affected. I think of Niloufar, Alisha, Lua and Niya. I’m sure you can think of a sister, mom, friend or co-worker who is fighting the same battle. There are more than 2.8 million women with a history of breast cancer in the U.S. in 2016 alone. This includes women currently being treated and women who have finished treatment. With a double mastectomy and her wedding scheduled for later this summer, Dede’s journey is far from over. We are with them and now we are with you, Dede.
 







 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/summer-mclane/in-the-fight-of-her-life-she-is-not-alone_b_9527488.html 
Thank you to all of the vendors who made Dede and Stephen’s engagement shoot possible:
Wedding Planner: My Simply Perfect Events
Photography: Loyall Hart of Ross Oscar Knight Photography
Videography: Eric Blanks of Eric Blanks Media
Venue: The Swan House at The Atlanta History Center
Dede’s Gown: Wedding Angels Bridal Boutique
Stephen’s Tuxedo: The Modern Gent
Makeup: Paula Xiong
Bouquet: Some Theme To Talk About


Friday

Sarah & Will!


Sarah & Will were married on a beautiful October evening. Their wedding day was running the way that most wedding days usually run: a vendor doesn't show up on time, pinning boutonnieres on the groom and his groomsmen, making sure that the guests don't sneak into the private room where the bride is waiting. When we got to the church, Sarah was in a side room with her bridesmaids and a few family members. These moments always feel a bit chaotic inside, to me. There was a lot going on in the room but I'll never forget looking over at Sarah so peaceful and really taking in the moments right before she walked down the aisle to Will. I was taken aback by how she was able to have this truly genuine moment to herself with so much going on in that room. It's a moment I've seen with many brides and those moments I'll never forget.





















Wednesday

Karida & Derrell!


Karida and Derrell are both dancers, they're both from Portland, OR, they have mutual life-long friends...basically, they were meant to be together. There is nothing better to me, as a planner, than watching each couple interact with each other. Karida is one of the happiest, sunshiniest (yes, that's a word) people I've ever met. Seeing her face light up and her smile take over her whole being when Derrell is around is the best thing ever! Derrell plays it cool but when she's not looking, you can't stop his smile either.

Their entire wedding day was a dream so get comfy and enjoy!  Thank you Nathan Cordova Studios for these unbelievable shots!

 






 


 

The Vow Renewal

 
 
When I was younger, my family always made fun of me for being nosey. If something was lost, they'd ask me where it was and I always knew. Being the youngest, I didn't want to be left out so I made sure to poke my nose everywhere it wasn't supposed to be. Not only was I nosey but I was also extremely protective of my mother. She never needed it but apparently, I thought it was my job. I'll never forget the moment when my nosiness collided with my need to protect and comfort her.
 
 
 
Whenever my mom laughed really hard, she would kind of wail. She always said that it was the only way her stomach muscles would loosen up. Her wailing laugh was a common sound in our house which always made my sisters and me laugh. Late one night when I was just 9 years old, I heard the familiar sound; except this time, it wasn't coming from laughter but from sorrow. Without knocking, I crept in, saw my mom kneeling on the floor with her head buried in the bed. She was on the phone. I assumed one of her friends was telling her a hilarious story and obviously I needed to know what it was. I stood there thirsty for a punch line when she looked up at me with a face full of tears and bloodshot eyes. I sat down on the bed and rubbed her back for what felt like hours.
 
 
 She was on the phone with her fiancé, Richard. Through her sobbing and weeping, I was able to piece together that his parents had taken away their consent to be married. As members of the Bahai Faith each member has to obtain consent from their parents to marry. They had flown to Northern California to ask his parents for consent, which they had happily given -- only to have his mother call days later to rescind it because she was worried about what people would think of her having a black daughter-in-law.
 
My mom and Rich knew each other in passing, years before when my sisters, his son and daughter were members of a Bahai youth group. They didn't keep in touch until they bumped into each other years later at a Bahai celebration. He took her on a date and they both knew that night they had found the One. Eight months later, he proposed. Rich had been renting a room from his best friend since his house was an hour from his job. With his son being the only one living there and my mom's job being down the street, he asked my mom, my sisters, myself and my grandma to all move into his house. After they got consent taken away, he decided that he would continue renting a room from his friend forever if he had to. They called off the wedding, not the relationship.
 

Friday

Traditional Haka Performed for New Zealand Couple


If you haven't seen the video of the Haka being performed for the bride and groom who ultimately joined in, you've probably been living under a rock!  I've seen the Haka performed many times and while it's always emotional, I've never been more moved than I was while watching it performed for New Zealand couple Aaliyah and Ben Armstrong.  Ben's best man planned the Maori wedding haka because he knew how important it was to recognize their Polynesian heritage.

For those unfamiliar with what a haka is, it is described as an intimidation tactic, an ancient war dance of the Maori people. Each haka has its own set of chanted lyrics, synchronized stomping and slapping of the body and facial expressions – like flashing one’s tongue or teeth and going bug-eyed – to intimidate on the battlefield.

The couple said, “For Polynesians and Maori’s, a traditional haka is usually performed in their traditional language and has different aspects to it, depending on where they are from,” Aaliyah and Ben tell The Knot. “We both have some Maori Ancestry in our families.”
Present-day haka, pulled from the traditions of the Polynesian people, have now been transformed into shows of cultural pride, honor, and unity.
 
At the reception Ben’s Best Man kicked off the call and response chant after his speech, and though it was planned in advance the couple said it, “was somewhat of a surprise to who had joined in on the haka.” Groomsmen, bridesmaids, wedding guests and even the guests of honor themselves – the bride and groom – participated in the intense display.
 
Check out the video but make sure to grab some tissues!